I have been in a bit of a bad way at times lately. Just problems, and nothing major, but out of my hands to resolve.
I have a small crucifix on the table beside my chair. I can’t remember where it came from. It might have belonged to my mother, or I might have found it in the street. Years ago, anyway. It looks as if it was once attached to a rosary.
When things were at the point of becoming too much, I picked up this crucifix, and offered a little prayer for help. And the words came into my head: “Keep your eyes on Me.” So that’s what I’m doing, and it helps a lot.
Just thought I’d share that small thing, since I have received a great deal of help in the past from other bloggers. I have them on my side-bar. In addition, most of the UK-based Catholic bloggers can be followed via the ever-useful British Catholic Blogs, together with links to their latest posts.
Picture from Google Images, with acknowledgments to The National Catholic Register.
2 comments:
I was listening to the radio, my favourite station is the UCB channel (UCB stands for unitied christian broadcasting). It is on air through the night and day and when I am sometimes awake for days at a time (not often, thank God) their words, prayers and worship songs have truly and literally sustained me and caused me to keep trusting, praying and staying with my faith, despite the way things look, in the shadowlands.
Anyway, to get to my point, a protestant minister was saying that he had started to wear a crucifix, even though he realised that this was something that mainly only Roman Catholics wear, christians of other faiths more commonly opting for a simple cross.
He assured his listeners that he wasn't turning Catholic (yet, I thought..) but that when he focused on the Crucifix, it gave him strength and that now, whenever the going gets tough, he touches the crucifix around his neck and says to Jesus, "If you could go through that for me, then I can go through this for you(he then names whatever he is going through)."
Well, he taught me to be a better Catholic that day, regarding my attitude with suffering I mean.
I was given a crucifix for my birthday this year and have been clinging to it in the way the minister suggested whenever things go haywire!
It works, praise God. I find my trust in God for outcomes is growing, my role is to do the footwork, results are not my department. As a person who has harboured expectations throughout life and held resentments when they were let down, this is a truly freeing place to be starting from. Old habits die hard ofcourse and expectations manifest unconsciously sometimes, only recognised when I notice I am disappointed or angry with someone or something.
As for other's expectations of me, that I am still struggling with. I hate letting people down, but I also don't do pressure well and that's when you know what raises it's head. Think cork (not the county), think bottle......
I am sure God will send me some wisdom about this soon, once He has shown me my tendencies that need surrendering.
One day at a time
PS. Sorry, you only wanted a comment, you got a whole sermon haha! Well, it is Sunday,I'm in a preachy mood ;)
Thank you, Shadowlands, for that very helpful comment. Your blog was one of those I had in mind when I wrote this post.
What an interesting story about the Protestant minister! It's lovely to hear about such things.
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